Honey Badger..."Mom, Have You Had Gluten?"

Confessions of a "Honey Badger Mother"

The day I turned into Mama Bear — and what on earth food has to do with it.

This afternoon my kids finished their chores and their homework and went tearing outside to play. They weren't out long before one of them came running back in with big news: a neighbor kid had thrown a rock — at another child's head.

As the story came together, it turned out the rock had been aimed at MY son, while he was riding his knee board down the road. He ducked, thank goodness, and it sailed right past him. But friends... the Mama Bear came roaring up out of me so fast I could feel my blood boiling. A rock. At a child's head.

I had to stop and breathe before I said or did a single thing — because Mama Bear, bless her, is not exactly famous for her clear thinking. And that pause is actually where I want to take this. Because the first thing all that heat wanted to do was aim itself at a kid. And kids are kids. Every one of them is somebody's little one, having a hard day, or a hard season, or learning things nobody's gotten around to teaching them yet. Including mine. Including me.

Exhibit A: me

So let me not write about the neighbors, and let me write about something truer and a lot more useful — how much what we eat shapes how we feel, and how we act. And I'll go first, because I'm the best evidence I've got.

My kids can tell, without me breathing a word, whether I've had gluten. I turn into a different mom — short-fused, foggy, quick to snap. One afternoon I barked at my oldest for the hundredth time and he stopped, looked at me, and asked — dead serious — "Mom... have you had gluten?" "NO," I snapped back, "it's just that I've asked you twenty times already!"

Reader. I had absolutely had gluten. My children now refer to gluten-me as a bit of a "Honey Badger Mother," and honestly? Fair.

I say this with love and total humility: food makes a difference. Not because it's magic, and not because any smoothie can fix a hard heart or a hard day — but because the body and the brain are wired together, and when I feed mine junk, or get glutened by accident, I feel it in my patience, my focus, my temper. When I eat clean and green, I'm steadier. I'm a kinder mom. That's not a claim about anybody else's child, and it's certainly not a diagnosis for the kid down the street. It's just what I've watched happen, over and over, in my own kitchen and in my own skin.

My little reset buttons

Which is why a big green smoothie in the morning has become one of my quiet little tools. It genuinely helps me feel more like myself. I won't promise it'll turn anyone's whole day around — but on the mornings I have one, I tend to meet my kids as a calmer version of me, and that is worth a great deal.

And when I feel the heat rising anyway — with five kids, it rises — I've got a couple of small rituals to help me reset instead of erupt. I love breathing in a calming essential oil like Frankincense; a few slow breaths and a beat to myself do more than I'd expect. Other times I just step away and put the kettle on for a cup of herbal tea (chamomile is a favorite around here). None of it is a cure for a temper. It's a pause button — a way to catch myself before I say the thing I'll wish I hadn't.

So no, I didn't march across the street and unload on a child today. I took my deep breaths, sat my own kids down for a serious talk about staying safe, and I'll follow up with the neighbor the calm, grown-up way I'd hope someone would if the shoe were on my child's foot — remembering, the whole time, that she's somebody's little one too.

And me? I believe I'll go blend a green smoothie. This Honey Badger Mother could use one.

Lots of love to you,

Steffanie

These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration and are not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. Nothing here is medical advice. This post reflects my own personal experience; please talk with your own healthcare provider about what's right for you and your family, and always follow safe-use guidelines for essential oils.